In the beginning of the year, Siggi’s, the Icelandic Yogurt brand held their annual contest/challenge – write an essay about what it would be like to go without your phone for one month. If your essay wins, Siggi’s will give you $10,000 for the month with the expectation that you’ll take the next month to experience life without your phone.
I wrote my essay like it was the most important paper I’d ever write, then I felt inspired to meditate. I went on to have one of the most powerful meditation sessions ever and when I opened my eyes, I decided I wasn’t going to watch TV for the next month. The concept felt totally aligned in my meditation glow, but let’s be real. This idea was straight out of left field. Here’s what happened….
The things that weren’t working in my life became apparent.
Apparent seems too lame a word to describe the discovery I went through in the following month… while it started as subtle, warm nudges in my awareness, it quickly became uncomfortable and loud. I felt like there were gaping holes in my life – things I wanted, things I didn’t have. I realized that I was not getting any closer to them now. The longer I sat with them, without a TV screen to distract me, the more it ate at me.
My creativity kicked way up.
As humans, one of our biggest gifts is our ability to create. And when there’s nothing distracting you from your desires and what you want…. when you become so undeniably uncomfortable, you will create a new way of being. When nothing is numbing you, you will make the changes that you need to make in your life. I started answering the call to get serious about my business. I started to write again. I signed up for the marathon I’d been saying I wanted to run for the last two years. And most important, I started to reframe what I really wanted.
I went cold-turkey on a major addiction.
I don’t think people often think of TV as an addiction, but I quickly discovered that it is. When I let go of watching television, I had to acclimate to a truer version of myself. I had to learn to regulate my emotions…. sober. It dawned on me that I was never taught how to do that as a kid. Only how to stuff them down, largely with television. If you’re binge watching shows because you’re committed, what you’re actually doing is numbing.
I was an emotional WRECK.
If you’ve walked away from an addiction before then you know being an emotional wreck is to be expected, and this was no different. When I started this journey, it was just a fun idea that came to me like fairy dust in a meditation. I didn’t expect to be turning my whole life upside down, but alas… The early days were not cute. The later days were also not cute. I cried when I got the wrong burrito. One night, I screamed into my pillow so loud I’m sure the neighbors could hear. I had a panic attack in Costco. Instead of betraying myself, I felt everything. I stopped fighting. It’s through this process that I learned how to step away and surrender. When I allowed my emotions to have a voice, I began to develop radical trust within myself. I can honestly tell you, I’ve never known myself better than I do right now.
Before this, I’d been tolerant of violence in ways I did not know.
In my second month of not watching TV, my mom had a show playing in the living room while I was making lunch. A little boy who’d been missing turned up dead in a river. My heart swelled with sorrow and I was surprised when I started crying and couldn’t stop. Desensitization is a defense mechanism orchestrated by our bodies when we become overloaded by too many things – unnatural to our normal state – are happening at once. It’s a hard thing to describe, caring for a little boy I’d never seen from a fictional show like he was a dear friend, but once you experience something similar you will never again question just how deeply the things we choose to consume affect us.
The Results?
I started with one month which turned into two months and now I’m on month five. I went 2 months straight without watching TV. In the last three months, I’ve watched three shows. And I also ran my marathon!!
Conclusion.
To say this has been a powerful experience for me would be an understatement. If you’re thinking of doing a television cleanse, jump in. The water is horrible at first, but it gets better and better until you don’t want to get out. When we take away the things we use to numb, there is so much power on the other side. In the space of feeling your feelings, you can create a life that’s in total alignment with your soul and your purpose.
Sending so much love & power to your journey,
